Low down, Honky Tonk, Second Draft Blues

So here's the deal. In April of 2006 I decided to take a romance writing class. I wanted to write a novel. A chick lit novel. A few months later, chick lit was pronounced dead on arrival. I kept the idea, and turned my novel into a quirky romantic comedy. I'm using the term "novel" loosely here since all I had was about 8k and one hell of a learning curve to still climb. I decided I needed a push to help me move the novel along so I signed for an Advanced Novel Writing Workshop. By then, AoTP was gathering some momentum, and a 10k club was formed. The 10k club didn't work for me, but I finished my workshop and had 50K by mid-January. Most of it stunk, but I had 50k. By March I had 60-65K. Of course that included lots of throwaway scenes, iffy gray and black moments, poor transitions and so on. Whatever. I just wanted a completed draft. To push me through to the end, I signed up for another workshop, a local one, and swore on my life I'd have my first draft done by my birthday on May 21st. I finished three weeks early-- pat on the back-- and prepped for a contest and blah, blah, blah. If you've been reading along, you've "heard" me rant, rave, whine. I should be happy now, but . . .

I hate my first draft.

I think someone snuck into my files and added unnecessary words and scenes, and deleted all the moments of brilliance I was sure I had put in there. Whoever you are, I'm mad as hell and I'm going to get you.

Just kidding.

I think I need to stick it in a drawer and not think about it for a month and then start rewriting. I had hoped to dive right in and have it shiny, brilliant and stellar before the RWA conference but that simply may not happen. After I read the whole stinky thing, I wanted to put it in the shredder, pull all my hair out and beat up everyone in my workshop group. Seriously.

Have I mentioned that I can be a bit of a drama queen sometimes? If not, note that quietly, and take a bit of advice--don't call me a drama queen when I'm actually being one if you're within kicking distance. My roundhouse kick is much better than my first draft.

Anyway, everyone at AoTP is now kicking into gear to finish up their first drafts so I have no one to howl at the moon with. I have a couple new crit partners with finished drafts but they're weirdly serene people. I don't trust weirdly serene people. We're writers--aren't we supposed to be a little high strung?

Thankfully, Macy sent us a link to Tess Gerritsen's blog on second drafts a few weeks ago. It soothes my soul a bit. I'm not from outer space, and I'm not necessarily the world's worst writer. And heck, a lot of people don't complete a first draft of their novel in a year, right?

Anyway, enough whining--you'll hear plenty more on Sunday when we blog on the things that frustrate the hell out of us about our own writing, writing processes, writing situations. I'll give you three wild guesses on who came up with that topic. For now, I have to skip over to my Alyson blog and gossip about all the shite that's been going down in blog world this week. Yowza! Kathryn Falk's message to Karen Scott (or was it Kathryn?), Tony C at Smart Bitches(also see More Tony or is Tony), the debate over at Romancing the blog about whether authors should review/critique one another's books. Fun stuff if you're into drama like, uh, someone I know.

Actually, the gossip blog may not go up till tomorrow. I need a drink to go with my low down , honky tonk, second draft blues (which are not to be confused with my "so many crits, so few brain cells with which to sort it all out" blues I belted out a couple weeks ago--ha!)

Goal after Sunday-- no whining for a couple weeks:)

Cheers and happy writing,
Alyson

P.S I just found this so I'm borrowing it from Billy Mernit at Living the Romantic Comedy. Too funny, and it TOTALLY applies in its own way although I'm not exactly on my final draft. I'll have to come up with my own version for my second draft blues--

THE 5 STAGES OF FINAL DRAFT WRITING

1. Denial

It's really in very good shape. Sure, I've got a ton of notes, but it's nothing I can't handle...

2. Anger

Who is the cretinous asshole who wrote this crap?

3. Bargaining

If I can just have [enough methamphetamine, a roomful of writers a helluva lot smarter than I am, a time machine, etc.], I promise I'll have this in good enough rough shape for the draft after the final draft!

4. Depression

I am SO fucked.

5. Acceptance

As awful as this one is, the next one can only be better. And I still (sort of) have my health.